Audrea Eunice is the name of my Cabbage Patch Kid, which resides in a box in a closet in one of my rooms in my parents' home.

My father gave her to me for Christmas, whichever year it was that they were the HOT MUST-HAVE GIFT. She had diapers and crackers and a bottle, and all kinds of instructions. I was a good babysitter.

I won two hours early release from work today, so I'm home watching this Triple Extreme Elmo Psychosis on the news, so blissfully happy I don't have to go anywhere to fight for one. I got knocked down for a bridal bouquet once. I'm non-violent, and shop early.